Carlos leaned tiredly against the wall, closing his eyes so he didn't have to look at his friends. Karone and Vie hadn't returned yet; he figured they were trying hard to throw this Vincent guy off. Someone touched one of the injuries on his chest and he flinched away, opening his eyes to see Cassie looking at him with one eyebrow raised. "Calm down," she told him. "I'm not going to bite you, you should know that by now." She sighed. "Take your shirt off."
He straightened a little, wincing at the pain that flared from the movement. It was an unwelcome reminder that he had failed Andros. "What's wrong?" he asked.
"I can't get a good look at these injuries through your shirt," she told him. He nodded, pulling it over his head, then looked over at Ashley, who sat in the corner, turning the battlizer over in her hands.
"Is she going to be okay?" he asked, whispering so he wouldn't disturb her. She seemed radiant, glowing, much as she had four years ago. He closed his eyes to cut off the memory.
"We hope so," Cassie said softly. "What about you?"
"Me? I'm fine." He shrugged, grimacing as she probed gently at one of the wounds.
"Carlos," Ashley's voice broke into his thoughts. "What happened to you?"
He opened his eyes and looked to find her standing next to him, and shifted to hide his scars a little better. "When?" he asked finally.
"When you left." Her eyes were open, honest, and he had to look away from her, staring unseeingly at the floor.
"I needed to get away from the memories of Brianna and Harmony." The names fell off his tongue with relative ease, now, thanks to Kyeri. He winced at a new pain, that of memory. He didn't think she'd ever talk to him again. "I sold the house and took off on the next transport out; I guess I was just lucky Ylaran was picked up at that time. He recovered fine, and says thanks for the excellent care."
"Ylaran?" Cassie asked, stepping away. Carlos pulled his shirt back on.
"Yeah. He was one of the cadets injured that year. I guess there were a lot; I heard there was a scandal about it, but none of the details." He'd met the boy again on assignment, and Ylaran had asked him to relay the message. At that point, he'd intended to go home again, sometime.... Cassie gave him his shirt back, and he pulled it back on, relieved they hadn't asked about his scars.
"So you left with his family," Ashley prompted.
Carlos turned to look at her. "I was sorry to hear that you lost your child," he said, barely able to get the words out. She smiled and touched his shoulder.
"Thank you." There was a touch of sorrow in her words. "How did you hear?"
"I... I heard before I left. And I'm sorry I didn't say anything then...."
"That's okay. I understand." She sat next to him and slipped her arm through his; he shifted, uncomfortable, feeling trapped. "Where did you go?"
He took a deep breath. "The first stop was KO-35, but Ylaran and I didn't get off the ship. Ylaran was injured, and I didn't want to talk to Kinwon or anyone else who might have recognized me. The stop was short." He paused. "I don't remember where all I went, or even the name of the planet I left Ylaran's company. I did a lot of odd jobs until I met Jharf." He could feel a smile starting on his lips at the thought of the Naga-like being, and it felt a little strange. He hadn't smiled in a long time.
"He runs a... body-guard-for-hire-type of operation. He's the only one I told where I was from and that I was a Ranger, although I wasn't sure I still was; I just kept wearing black because it fit me, fit my mood. He helped me change my bracelet, but I kept wearing it so that I wouldn't get really sick again." He glanced sideways at Cassie, who nodded.
"Good thinking," she said.
"Thank you." It came out a little more sarcastic that he wanted; he didn't want to get too comfortable with them, wanted to stay distant, so when he left again it wouldn't cause them so much pain. They wouldn't need that, on top of everything else.
Ashley nudged his side and scowled briefly at him. "Go on," she urged.
"I took various jobs, nothing really dangerous, until I was hired, with a few others, by Kyeri Akweks to keep her father, Zouriken, safe. He was one of Trey's advisors, so I spent some time on Triforia, then he returned to Jaiquan as ambassador. If nothing else, I can speak fluent Triforian." He swallowed hard. "I went with him. Kyeri, when I wasn't guarding her father, talked to me - I think she guessed, or Trey told her, who I was, or had been - and eventually, I talked to her.... We became friends. Because of her, it doesn't hurt so badly to think of Brianna and Harmony." His voice broke, then failed entirely, and he took a deep breath to give himself some space.
They remained silent, almost as if to also give him the space he needed, and he thanked them silently. "I don't think we've ever met Kyeri Akweks," Cassie said finally. "What's she like?"
"She's very understanding. Very...." He cleared his throat; this topic was only a little less painful than the other one. "Not a warrior, and I think she was ashamed of that, sometimes. But Zouriken was understanding of her, and she.... She seemed to understand me, and that... allowed me to...." His voice failed again. "To grieve properly, I guess."
Cassie nodded, but he could only tell because he could see her long black hair moving. Ashley touched his shoulder gently. "What happened while you were there?" she asked gently, and he pulled his arm from her grip and got up to get away from them. He felt vaguely smothered.
"Don't ask," he said softly. Someone took his arm, and he turned to see Cassie, smiling at him.
"We're asking, Carlos. Now's your chance to explain." She help up his morpher. "And to tell us why you won't wear this."
Panic filled his mind, and if he hadn't been so determined not to fail again, he would have gone to find the invaders and gotten himself really killed this time. "No," he shook his head. "You don't want to know that."
Cassie pulled him over to where Ashley was, and made him sit down; Ashley slipped her arm through his again. "It's time to tell us, Carlos." There was no room for him to get out of it, and he prayed for Karone or Vie or both to show up again. But the door remained stubbornly closed, and no one appeared in the vent.
"It's eating you up," Ashley said softly. "It's time to let it out. And you know we won't judge you." He gave her an incredulous look. "We won't," she repeated.
Carlos took a deep breath and focused his eyes on the ground. He didn't want to go on, to relive that horror. Ashley nudged him gently again, and he glanced at her, wondering if she could see the panic he was feeling. "While on Jaiquan, I found out what we had been hired for," he started hesitantly. "There was a... terrorist group stationed there, without the sanction of the government, and they were going to attack Triforia, specifically, Trey." The words stuck in his throat, and he cleared it. "I don't know what their grievance was. There must have been someone inside the government associated with them, though, because they knew too much. There were too many coincidences." His hands clasped tightly together. "Zouriken got some kind of information while visiting the main government building, I don't know exactly what, but the minute we got back to the embassy, he ran inside. Kyeri wasn't home, I found out later." Much later, he thought, and gave thanks as he did every time the nightmare crossed his mind. "Not two minutes after that, a mob stormed the gates, and then they were inside, and these people...." His voice failed him again. "I tried to keep them outside, we all did. When it didn't work, we retreated..." He took a deep breath, and glanced at both of them. "It was like reliving the destruction of the Power Chamber all over again," he said softly.
"That must have been horrible," Ashley said softly, and gently patted his arm.
"Not one of the best times of my life," he agreed, and focused down on his hands again. "We were overwhelmed, unable to do anything but fight, guarding the door...." He took a deep breath to calm himself. "I was the last one standing, I don't know how long I held out. Some of them got by me.... I heard his death cry before they threw me into a reinforced stone wall." He swallowed. "It... I woke up about three weeks later, I think, but I didn't remember anything, some sort of mercy from someone.... I would rather have lived with the pain," he spat out, "but once the medication they were giving me got to addictive levels, they kept me asleep, some sort of ‘psychic dampening'. I was out for four months. And when I woke up, I remembered." That feeling of utter helplessness washed through him again, and his shoulders hunched against the memory. "Kyeri had taken her father's place as ambassador, but she was on Triforia. I left and went back to work for Jharf, possibly because no one else would have hired me. He told me where to go and I went, I really didn't care where.... And then he told me I was needed on Earth, and teleported me to Andros' office as soon as I accepted the assignment." He could hear the bitterness in his voice. "It... almost killed me. But maybe.... maybe he thought..." His voice failed him again and he stared at the floor. There, it was all out. He knew they knew Zouriken; he'd talked about meeting Andros and Ashley once, and how much Zhane reminded him of himself, when he was younger.
"That was you?" Ashley asked in disbelief, and he flinched at her voice. Then a noise from the door made them all look up.
The door inched open, and Karone stepped into the room. She glanced around, then scowled at the three there. "Where's Vie?" she asked.
Carlos' heart sank. "She was with you," he said. Please, no, not again. I can't have failed again.
"I lost her about half an hour ago. She was supposed to get back into the vents and come back here." Karone looked almost as panicked as he felt, then calmed down. Carlos took a deep breath and prepared himself; mourning would come later. Or whatever was necessary. They had work to do. Karone recognized it as well. "Mission accomplished," she said in an even voice, and held out the blaster. Cassie took it. "And, what's more, they're expecting Astronema to show up and try to kill Andros and Zhane. There's no one in Jerome's office, and one of the men is presumed dead." She smirked coldly. "I left him unconscious in one of the closets, so we have this." She held out a radio. "As long as we keep quiet, we can hear them, but they can't hear us. They know I have it, but it could keep Andros and Zhane a little saner if I.... "check in" every once in a while."
Carlos stared at the floor. Going on was necessary, he reminded himself. "Now what?"
"Vincent!" Cassie suddenly said triumphantly. "Took me long enough!"
"What?" Karone asked.
"Remember, four years ago, how many injured cadets we had? About half of that class wound up in Medical, and most of them had to go home. Ylaran was one of them. They had suddenly gotten accident prone, or something, no one could figure it out. We had so many injuries that we didn't even manage a graduating class that year. Anyway, Zhane was looking into it for me, because I couldn't believe so many were like that. He found out that one of the cadets was... getting rid of the competition. Vincent Corry." Cassie smiled thinly, and Carlos clenched his teeth to keep from growling his fury out. "That's who this is. Why he wants Ashley, I'm not sure, but I'll bet two weeks paid vacation it's revenge."
"No bet," Karone said. "I'm pretty sure you're right."
"So," Carlos said angrily, once again in command of his voice, if only for a minute, "what are we going to do now?"
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