It was all Obi-Wan could do not to scream. It hurt, everything hurt, and the Healer didn't seem to be doing anything about it. "They'll just make it worse," Master Denk's voice said in his mind, echoing what Master Sorin had said, echoed in turn by Master Toman. "Not true," he murmured. "Not true."
He felt adrift, had ever since Master Jinn had removed his hand from his chin. It had felt like the only anchor in the sea of pain. He knew that somewhere, Master Yoda and Theela were doing something to heal him, but he couldn't tell the difference.
And then he could, only the pain wasn't easing like he thought it should. Instead, the pain in the knee Master Toman had twisted sharpened suddenly, and he gasped at it. "No," he moaned, but didn't want to believe what his Masters had said. They'd lied. They'd lied about everything else, this had to be a lie, too.
"I'm sorry," Theela said from a distance, and she sounded frustrated. "Master Yoda, it is as if every wound he's ever had is returning. I know that knee was healed."
"They said..." Obi-Wan gasped. "They said going to the healers would make it worse. They just wanted to make sure it would." It's not true, he told the Masters in his mind. It's not true!
There was a sudden, familiar snap in his mind, and his whole body shuddered. The pain eased. "Without me you may work," Yoda said, and it sounded like he was far away. Before Obi-Wan could think of a response, the full force of healing hit him and he descended into a painless dark.
When he woke up, he felt better. He moved his arms and legs experimentally, feeling the skin pull in places. That reminded him of what had happened, and he glanced around the room. To his relief, it was empty, but the idea of laying there and waiting for whoever had attacked him to come and get him was not one he liked. He sat up and wavered slightly as his vision swam. The door opened then, and Theela appeared in the doorway. "What are you doing?" she asked.
"I feel much better," he said. "I thought I'd better get back to my duties."
"You are where you are supposed to be," she said firmly. "You are to stay here for a while longer at least. I've already informed Master Jinn and Master Windu you will not be meeting with them this afternoon."
"No!" Obi-Wan protested. "You can't do that." His voice trailed away, and his eyes dropped. "I'm sorry," he said softly. They'd never let him go with that kind of attitude, that was for sure. "How long?"
Theela didn't answer for a moment. "For the rest of today, at least. Someone will bring you lunch, and I'm pretty sure you'll be able to get dinner on your own, if you rest like you're told." Her voice was kind, understanding.
Obi-Wan immediately lay down. "May I read something?" he asked.
Theela chuckled. "Certainly, child. Anything specific?"
He paused, wondering that himself, when the idea popped into his head. "History of the Jedi Order," he said, although he wasn't exactly sure why. The Force indicated it was a good choice, so he went with it.
"Anything specific? That's a lot of information."
"No, I don't think so," he said, hesitant, but the Force didn't offer any help this time. "Anything that you think is interesting?"
Theela chuckled. "You're likely to find it dry reading, but I'll see what I can do."
She presented him with a datapad about an hour later, letting it slide from her large hand onto the table next to his bed. With one hand that covered his back, she sat him up and arranged a handful of pillows for him to lay against. When he was comfortable, she tousled his hair and left the room. As soon as she had gone, he started to read.
Bant and Garen brought lunch with them, and he set the datapad aside to catch up with them, their laughter and smiles brightening his day considerably. Garen looked somehow different to Obi-Wan's eyes, and it took him a minute to realize it was the braid he now wore. He grinned suddenly. "Bant told me you'd gotten a Master but I didn't believe her," he said.
Bant huffed slightly, but didn't correct him, and he was glad. He didn't want to explain how he'd lost all control when he'd heard.
When they'd left, he settled back into reading the histories Theela had supplied him with. The second one he read mentioned the prophecy of the Chosen One, and he felt a nudge from the Force. He began searching for more on those prophecies, only to find frustratingly little in the information Theela had given him. Marking the ones he found for further research, he continued to read. To his surprise, he was getting sleepy, and every time he blinked, it took him longer to open his eyes. He fought valiantly to keep awake, but realized after a while that he was losing the battle.
He was watching what looked like a great lightsaber battle, although he could not see who wielded the weapons. Blue and green blades worked together against a double-bladed red. Green was suddenly extinguished, permanently, and he thought he heard a cry of anguish and despair before blue and red fought. Then the blue went out, and after a moment, green flared to life and destroyed red. He knew - somehow - that the blue blade had been reborn as green.
The datapad Obi-Wan had been reading slipped through his fingers to rest on the bed by him.
Time passed - the scene changed. A blue blade fought a red one and was tossed aside by a lightning strike. A green blade took up the fight against the red one and was defeated but not destroyed. Not destroyed because the blue blade stormed into the battle and intercepted the blow, then blue became blue and green, blades whirling in a blaze of light. They, too, were defeated and injured gravely but not destroyed, because of the appearance of another green blade. It fought red, and red vanished as it was defeated.
Unconsciously, Obi-Wan rubbed at his left thigh, a grimace of pain on his face, then his arm fell limply at his side again. His expression eased.
Again, time passed, if shorter than before. This time, the blue and green blades fought, battling each other almost desperately. From where the hilt of the blade would be, the green became red, slowly at first and then traveling quickly up the blade until the red glowed complete. This battle ended with red defeated and shattered, but not destroyed. And even blue was injured, though he felt no joy, no triumph at it's victory, only sadness and a wrenching grief.
"No," he whispered softly.
There was a sense of great time passing. Red battled blue, but the blue blade had aged. So had red, although the passage of time did not tell as much on it. The blue blade shone brighter than before, if more brittle. The darkness surrounding the blades seemed darker. More complete. He hadn't noticed it before, but there had been the sense of lights, more blades like blue and green, in the distance lightening the darkness. But they were gone or way out of reach. And then the blue sacrificed itself to the red, and he heard a cry, an echo of the despair and anguish from the first battle.
Obi-Wan sighed in his sleep, settling deeper into the pillows.
A blue blade battled a red one, quicker now, but not as well as the others. The blue blade was extinguished, yet there was not the sense of defeat or death he'd felt with the other ones, only a sense of pain and deep anguish.
A new green battled the same red blade, and this green blade had been reborn of the defeat of the blue blade. It defeated the red one. And then the red blade became green again, changing color from where the hilt would be, before extinguishing for the last time. He was sure, although again he couldn't say why, that the red that had become green was the same green that had become red before the long time had passed.
Obi-Wan started awake. It took him a minute to realize where he was, and he sank into the pillows with a sigh.
"This is pretty heavy reading."
He started again, guilty for a reason he couldn't define, until his brain kicked in and he recognized Knight Jinn's voice. "Theela said it would be okay," he responded, surprised at how defensive he was. Belatedly, he realized there had been no condemnation in the words.
"I know," the Knight said easily, and set the datapad on the table beside the bed. "But it is heavy reading. I've read them, too, and it took me a long time." He leaned forward conspiratorially. "They kept putting me to sleep."
Obi-Wan laughed, the dream already faded from his mind. "Which were your favorites?"
Qui-Gon paused, watching him, then smiled - a real smile, the first Obi-Wan had seen - and leaned back. "I don't know that I had a favorite, but the Chosen One prophecies always drew me."
Obi-Wan nodded enthusiastically. "But I don't understand," he added, almost shyly. "How is the Force out of balance?"
Qui-gon was silent for a moment. "That, my young friend, is a very good question. And if you feel it is important, I suggest you do some research on it. You might be surprised at what you find. I know I have been, in my own research."
"You could look, too," he said, caught up in the excitement, but Qui-Gon shook his head.
"It is your question, Obi-Wan. Perhaps it will be something only you will be able to answer." His brow furrowed. "And yet..." he murmured, but then he shook his head again and the expression eased. "How's your knee?"
Obi-Wan moved it experimentally and found there was no pain. "It's fine," he said. "It hurt..." He trailed off. "It was part of the bomb," he said. "I heard Theela say all my old injuries returned."
"Yes," Qui-Gon said seriously. "All the burns and all the injuries done to you through the Force were mapped out on your body again. Yoda saw them all." Qui-Gon gave a queer little smile. "I have never seen him so stern."
Obi-Wan's eyes widened. "What happened?"
"Your former Masters are in with the Council now, explaining their actions." He took a deep breath, almost as if he were coming to a decision. "I heard what you told your friend Bant about the Agri-corps," he started slowly. Obi-Wan's widened, and his heart dropped to somewhere around his ankles. "I spoke with Bant, because I wanted to make sure I had heard right." He paused, and his eyes held Obi-Wan's. "You believe you failed your Masters?"
Obi-Wan nodded, and the movement broke his paralysis. He was grateful to be able to study the wall beyond Qui-Gon's shoulder. "Yes, sir," he said, and was glad that his voice didn't quiver. "Even if the... guilt wasn't all mine because it was in those bombs, I must have done something to make them repudiate me."
The comm unit on Qui-Gon's belt beeped, but he ignored it. "Something made them repudiate you, yes," he said evenly, "but I'm nearly certain that it was nothing you did."
Stunned, Obi-Wan could only stare. Qui-Gon stepped away from him as he took the comm from his belt, answered it and received his instructions, and replaced it. He moved back near the bed, a contemplative look on his face. "Nearly certain?" Obi-Wan whispered.
"I don't have all the information yet, Obi-Wan. I must keep my options open. But I do not believe you are to blame in this." Qui-Gon smiled the familiar half smile. "I must speak with the Council. Theela says you will return to your normal schedule tomorrow. Sleep well, and I will see you tomorrow in the training room." He was gone before Obi-Wan could form a reply.
That evening, he was indeed released. It was nice to be back in his own room again. But the Force nudged him with the memory of the dream he'd had, and so he made his way down to the archives. He hadn't been there long enough to even find a station he could work at before Jocasta Nu was in front of him.
"How may I help you, young Kenobi?" she asked, a note of warning in her voice. Obi-Wan flushed, certain he knew why. She'd threatened to bar him from the archives the next time she found him asleep, whether at one of the terminals or in the stacks.
"I... wanted to know of any records of red lightsabers in the Jedi order," he said, his own voice subdued and sounding a little more scared than he really wanted it to.
Jocasta's brow furrowed, making her look older than she was. It also eased the stern look in her eyes. "A Jedi using a red lightsaber? Why?"
"It was a dream," he admitted. "I don't remember much of it, now, but there was a red lightsaber. Or more than one, I'm not sure."
"What else?"
He shrugged. "Blue and green, but I don't think they were wielded by the same people. And they were destroyed, some of them. I couldn't see people, even, just lightsabers. I have a blue lightsaber, and Master Jinn has a green one, and most other Jedi have blue or green, too, except for Master Windu, but I've never seen a red one."
Jocasta looked more contemplative, now, and after a moment of thought, she beckoned that he follow her. Setting him up at one of the terminals, she started a search. "If it doesn't produce anything," she said, "call me and I'll try something else."
The first reference was the Sith Wars. There weren't many other references, but all of them mentioned the Sith. It was a recording of a battle near the end of the Sith Wars that he got his first look at the red lightsaber. It was the same color as he remembered from his dream. Well, then, the battles in his dream were with the Sith. That meant his dream took place some time in past, because everything he read indicated that the Sith were gone.
With a deep sigh of satisfaction, Obi-Wan started another search. This one, on the balance of the Force, brought up only the prophecies of the Chosen One. He hesitated, checked the time, and shut down the station. He'd check again later; Theela had made him promise to go to bed early. As he left, he stopped by Master Nu's desk long enough to thank her. Back in his room, he lay down. He was asleep almost immediately, and his sleep was undisturbed.
Go on to Next Chapter | Problem Child
Home | Stories | Fun Stuff | Links | Contact me