Why did they have to give me the job of bringing the munchies? Soren Wydda asked himself walking from the meeting with the other padawans. Had they had money, it wouldn't have been a problem. But they didn't, so he had to make them. He didn't cook or bake. He couldn't. He became an invalid as soon as he entered a kitchen.
Kitchen... Oh great! He thought. The apartment that he shared with his Master, Alikkiki Neroti didn't have a kitchen since his Master didn't care about cooking either. He had told his padawan that he'd cooked once and Yoda had said: "Do that again, you will not."
Soren knew that there was more to the story but neither his Master nor Yoda were willing to fill him in, which left him to wonder if it wasn't for safety reason their apartment lacked a kitchen. In any case, that meant that Soren had to use the big Temple kitchen which certainly wasn't a place you knocked on the door and asked if you could borrow the oven. Especially not if your name was Soren Wydda.
At 9 he had been playing "force hide and seek" with his friends and he had hid in a large freezer in the kitchen. Accidentally he had fallen asleep, although he could not for the galaxy explain how that was possible in such a cold place, and was found 5 hours later by the not so happy chef. For one, the chef did not at all enjoy finding children among his food but on top of that, Soren had not been able to close the door completely so all the food, including finest Ilemikan lobster, had been ruined.
The chef has started to yell at Soren who had stood there with hacking teeth and at the brink of tears listening to the chef's threat of making him the new ingredient in his Coruscanti salad.
After Master Neroti and Master Yoda had talked to the chef he had calmed down and even apologized but Soren knew for a fact that the chef still disliked him and the feeling was mutual. Therefore, Soren was not so keen on asking him if he could borrow the kitchen. And he already knew the obvious answer. What he had to do then, was to get the chef out of the kitchen long enough for himself to make the munchies. That was easier said than done, but he had an idea so he stood up and turned to leave.
"Going anywhere, padawan?"
"Oh, Master. Yes, I'm going to pay Lineara a visit."
"Lineara? That is the little girl from your home planet, isn't it?"
"Yes, Master. It is."
"Very well then. I assume you will return here straight afterwards? I was thinking we could go over our last mission report tonight."
"Actually... I have kind of, um... planned this other thing..." Soren said cautiously. Master Neroti looked at him with raised eyebrows.
"May I ask what this is?"
"We're going to have a pa... gathering. You know, eat and talk. Just catch up with each other. If that is okay with you, Master?" Release your tension into the force, release your tension into the force, Soren thought. He was really bad at lying, especially to his Master.
"That would be fine, I assume. Who are the 'we' you're talking about?" His Master asked.
"Oh, Jahzea, N'erak, you know, same old, same old..."
"Jahzea? Then I guess Mace is free tonight. Maybe I should 'catch up' with him, as you put it. But I won't keep you any longer. You have your fan waiting. Say hello to her from me, will you?" Said Master Neroti.
"Sure Master. I will." Soren replied, turned around and quickly exited the room before his talkative Master could think another syllable.
------------------------------
"So you're all set? You know exactly what to do, Lineara?" Soren asked again, just to be sure.
"Yes, yes. I'll go to the healers, tell them my stomach hurts really bad and tell them it happened after I ate the Coruscanti salad. And pretend I have cramps." Lineara answered.
"And when the chef comes...?"
"I'll get even worse cramps and start to cry."
"Good."
"Now, you know that this'll cost you."
"I know, I will probably have paid you back when I'm Master Yoda's age."
"Don't worry, you'll never be that old."
------------------------------
After taking Lineara to the corridor leading to the Healer's, Soren ran down the stairs to the kitchen. He peeked through the window on the door and saw the chef dancing around while peeling a cucumber.
Oh, how repulsive! Soren thought but gathered himself and pushed the door open. "Ahem, excuse me?" He said carefully.
The chef abruptly stopped dancing and looked at him. Realization dawned at him as to whom it was that was standing in front of him.
"I'm not here to bother you," Soren said quickly. "I just want to inform that there is a little girl at the Healer's who's having really bad stomach cramps, and they started after she'd eaten one of your Coruscanti salads."
The chef's eyes grew large and his cheeks pale. His lower lip began quivering and his hands were shaking.
"M...my ff...food, eh, made th...this little g...girl sick? I must go to her... tell her it's all right. Tell her my food's not dangerous! Salad no dangerous, you know!" The chef managed to get out while on his way to the door.
The door swung close and Soren made a victory gesture. Things were going great!
------------------------------
Half an hour later, Soren was not so sure anymore about things going great. He stood in the middle of the kitchen floor surrounded by pans, pots and spoons. There were caramel covering the walls and muffin mixture was sprinkled in dots around the room. Soren himself was almost unrecognizable due to the large amounts of flour that covered him. Unconsciously, he dropped the pot he was holding, which fortunately was empty - not that it would have mattered.
"All that time I spent avoiding kitchens was very well-spent time. I should have continued that."
He ploughed his way to the oven and bent down to look at the cookies inside. They looked quite nice, though Soren had no idea whatsoever what the ingredients were. Deciding they were taking too long time to get ready, he increased the heat with the force.
Drinks... we need something to drink as well! Soren suddenly remembered.
He turned and started looking for something and for the first time since he entered the kitchen, he had the Force on his side for in a small room he found several crates of soda. As he was moving them out into the crowded kitchen he thought he sensed a burning smell and suddenly, it dawned on him.
"Sith! The cookies!" He yelled as he rushed to the oven.
It was too late. The cookies were already black and hard as brick. Nothing you could serve at a party, no matter what kind of party.
"Sith!" He repeated as he turned the heat down and removed the cookies from the oven.
When he thought nothing could get worse, the fire alarm went off due to the smoke from the cookies. Fed up with everything he took a broom standing by the door and slammed it into the fire alarm. It came crashing down on the floor, and missed Soren's head by an inch, but at least it stopped beeping. Devastated, Soren sank to the floor. What was he going to do now? He needed the munchies, and fast, for Force knew when the chef would return. That was when he saw his savior. On the top shelf above the fridge, placed as near the wall as possible stood some ready-made candy-mix packets. A wide grin spread across Soren's face. The chef certainly had his secrets. Who would have thought that he didn't do everything from scratch?
A second later, the candy-mix packets were all standing on the table in front of Soren. All he had to do was add water and put them in the oven. He couldn't possibly make the same mistake and burn the candy since he now had what degree should be used. This was too good to be true.
------------------------------
Not so much later, Soren had candy that would be enough to feed a whole clone army. It wasn't the best candy in the world, maybe, but it was edible and tasted quite well. As he was packing the candy into boxes he suddenly remembered he needed to bring a gift as well. He knew exactly what to give Obi-Wan for he had borrowed and "misplaced" his "Instant Lightsaber Cleaner" some months ago, so he figured it was time to get him a new one. All he needed to do was to run to his room and fetch it.
He took his candy boxes under his arm and peeked out of the kitchen door to make sure no one was around and saw him. He didn't have time to clean the kitchen, he just had to hope the chef didn't suspect him and come up with an alibi if he did. The coast was clear, so Soren ran all the way to his apartment, collected the gift from a drawer and turned to leave again. On his way out he walked past the mirror and saw himself.
"Oh, I look like a mess!" He exclaimed.
Indeed he did. Flour, caramel, yes even burnt cookies inhabited his hair, face and body. He laughed at himself. For as much as he hated to admit it, he had actually enjoyed being in the kitchen. Well, at least after it had started going well for him. He washed himself up a bit and then picked up his comm and called Dei.
"Dei here."
"Hi, it's Soren. I just wanted to tell you that I'm done in the kitchen. I'm in my room picking up my gift and, uh, freshening up a bit. I'm on my way down now."
"Okay, good. Does ‘done in the kitchen' mean that you have the munchies?" Dei asked
"It does, among other things."
"I don't think I want to hear about the other things." Dei said suspiciously.
"You don't. And neither does the chef, I guess. But as I said, I'll be down shortly."
"That's good. Don't lose the munchies on the way or something."
"Of course not... have you no faith in me?" Soren asked.
"No. And please try not to run into the chef, will you?"
"Bye Dei." Soren replied in his sweetest and most sarcastic voice as he turned off his comm and exited the room.
*********************************************
This post by the wonderful Cicci! Great job!
Go on to Next Chapter | Surprise
Home | Stories | Links | Contact me