Jordan watched his brother walk around the hotel aimless one afternoon when it hit him; he remembered now where he'd seen Jon acting like that before. He'd been trying to escape the truth that their father had left them, and had done it with uppers. He had never been sure which, but after about a week, Jon had been normal again. This had been going on for a month now. He took a deep breath, concentrating on his anger and frustration, and followed Jon into his room.
"What are you doin' now?" he demanded, staring at his brother. Jon looked at him, uncomprehending, hazel eyes dull. "The drugs! I thought you gave up on 'em."
"Oh, so you're my mother now," Jon said angrily, rousing slightly. "Good, Jordan. You can hardly control your own life and you wanna take care of mine?"
Jordan couldn't remember a time when Jon had gotten him this close to tears. "So you admit it? Well, that's something, at least. Your pride hasn't made you lose all your senses."
"Don't go there," Jon growled, hazel eyes flashing.
"You've got to stop doin' the drugs, man," Jordan said. "Peter knows. You'll be outa here in..."
"What makes you think I care?" Jon demanded.
Jordan decided he'd had enough and turned to leave, then turned back. "You've ruined everything, you know, everything you've worked for just as hard as I have." He was fighting tears. "Damn you, anyway!" he yelled, and punched him just as he came down from the drug given him at lunch. The blow to the left cheek bone knocked him to the bed, where he didn't move. "Damn you," Jordan whispered, and fled the room.
He refused to let anyone wake Jonathan for dinner, knowing he wouldn't eat; Jonathan hadn't eaten for a long time, though no one seemed to have noticed but him. He waited until just before the concert, waking him without a word. He'd decided to tell Peter about him the next morning, although it had been a hard decision. Chris wondered in fury how this would fit in with his plan. Well, if it worked out right, Jon would talk to JJ, and the last night would be tonight. It was good enough.
Jonathan felt something akin to what he remembered as normal as he dressed for the concert. Everyone else noticed the difference also, mostly because he sat quietly as he had before everything had exploded. He also looked exhausted. Danny wanted to talk to him, but Sam warned him off, not wanting a fight just before they went on stage, which had happened some weeks ago. Jordan stayed away from him, the tell tale tear marks gone from his face but not his eyes. JJ watched them all from the doorway, feeling the lack of spirit in the group. She wished she could help.
"Everyone ready?" Peter called, and they headed for the stage.
"Jonathan, can I talk to you after the concert?" JJ asked, tentatively touching his arm. He'd yelled at her earlier, but he seemed to be in a better mood now, and she wanted to know what was going on.
Jon looked back at her, remembering clearly how he'd treated her earlier, and wondered at her courage. Then he stopped a minute. Why could he remember getting mad at JJ but not buying and taking the drugs?
"Jon?" she repeated.
"Uh, yeah. My room?" He didn't meet her eyes.
She sighed. "Sure," she smiled, then pushed him to the back of her mind as she had since the tour started and ran on stage behind the rest of the band.
The concert went very well, though Jon said nothing, as he hadn't for the past month. He found that he had very little of his former energy and resolved to ask for help. He'd been really stupid to wait this long.
After the concert, Jon and JJ rode back to the hotel together in comfortable silence. His obvious exhaustion was quite a change; he was usually hyper, more so even than Donnie. They walked to his room, hand in hand, and he sank down on his bed with a grin.
"It's very nice to be tired," he said as she sat next to him, then he pulled her close and kissed her.
"What's going on?" she asked, somewhat breathlessly.
"I don't know. I guess I'm..." he paused. "No, I ain't gonna drag you into this. Go to bed."
"Jonathan Rasleigh Knight, I am sick of you pushing me away like this. Tell me what is going on." She paused, fighting the tears that welled up in her eyes.
Jon looked at her, his eyes slipping closed. "How about if I promise to tell you tomorrow? I'm really tired," he said. She smiled.
"I'll hold you to it," she said, and kissed him tenderly. He, unfortunately, didn't stay awake long enough to enjoy it. JJ laughed for the first time in weeks. "You would pull an Indiana Jones on me," she said, and moved to the door.
Outside the door, she found Chris going by. "Hey, Chris, would you consider putting Jon in bed? He just fell asleep," she explained, unable to stop grinning.
"Sure," he said, and walked into the room. "What did you do to make her so happy?" he asked the still form on the bed after the door closed. "That will be even better, you know." He removed Jon's shirt and threw it over the desk. "He's going to regret what he did to Theresa."
He left momentarily and returned with an outfit of JJ's he'd stolen earlier that week when she'd been doing laundry, sat down next to Jon, and set to work. After about half an hour, he pulled Jon across the carefully messed up bed and covered him with a blanket. Pausing by the door, he looked at his handiwork.
"All I have to do is get him to let me in tomorrow, then finish it for Theresa." He turned the light out, then the door closed behind him. "I want him to know who did it to him," he mumbled.
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